Throw the Ball Already and Other Things I Can’t Live Without

I’m just going to put it out there.  I love dogs.  I have almost always lived with at least one member of the canine variety and I plan on doing so until I am no longer able to care for a furry friend.  My early years were spent with a Cockapoo named Maxie.  She was a miniature in size only.  My parents adopted her before I was born and saved her from an abusive environment.  Because of that she was a bit skittish around unfamiliar people.  We usually had to keep her in a bedroom when company was over to avoid any incident.  She was a loving dog and loyal to the family until canine parvovirus finally claimed her at about sixteen.  After a few years of a pet-less house, my father surprised the family with an amazing ball of fur and fury that would grow into a 200 plus pound St. Bernard, Bernie.  She was too smart for her own good and would use her size and strength to escape the back yard sending me sprinting through the neighborhood after her.  She was the family’s center of attention for about three years.  Then came rescued sisters.  A Smooth Collie already named Lassie and a Shepherd, Malamute mix aptly named Rusty, would grace our home and create a circus for many years to come. 

I mentioned they were sisters.  Yes, they were litter mates.  Two completely different dogs from the same mother.  Ah, biology.  I will let you do the research.

These three amazing animals kept the family company, entertained, protected and comforted for the next decade, even as I left for college and then moved out to start my adult life.  No visit was complete without at least a few moments of play with each one of the three.  They were each unique with their own personalities.  They went through rawhide treats like Double-Mint gum. They patrolled the house for intruders.  Most were birds, squirrels or just traffic going by the house.  There was never a burglar, but we made them all feel like they had kept out Danny Ocean and his crew.  The only real crime that ever took place was the untimely death of a new vacuum every year.  Cause of death, dog hair. 

As I transitioned into my adulthood, I began with a few rescued cats.  I loved each of them dearly.  They were affectionate and great companions.  But, there was something missing.  My cats never poked me with a cold, wet nose to get up and play ball.  They never greeted me at the door with manic joy, even if it was just a short time since I had seen them.  I missed that.  Then, after a while something magnificent happened.  I met my wife.  She is without a doubt the best thing that has ever happened to me.  By this time, I was again pet-less.  So with my new girlfriend, came a wonderful Black Labrador Retriever mix by the name of Melanie.  I rediscovered what I was missing.  Shortly after I fell in love with both of them came some news that hit close to home.  This ball loving, bed hogging, cool floor seeking companion was diagnosed with diabetes.  Just like me.  My soon to be wife was devastated and began to talk to me about how hard it would be to put her down. 

I have never been one to put my condition out in the open. People know, I will talk about it, but it does not define me.  But now, I had to stop and open up.  I drew parallels between the two of us.  And she began to see that this could be manageable for her too.  It would require a little extra attention, but she could live a rich normal life.  And she would.  She stayed with us for another six years, making it beyond her twelfth birthday.  As time passed and we moved to Phoenix, after four years, our girl developed cataracts.  We checked into getting the removed, but were told they would only grow back.  Instead of giving up, we took a different route. 

After looking at a number of dogs, we had decided on a Siberian Husky.  We wanted to be sure he was the one, so we looked at a few more.  I was satisfied but my wife wanted to look at one more that caught her eye.  It was all over.  This dog chose us and I don’t think there was any way we were going home with anyone but her.  We got the living breathing Ajax tornado.  She was a bundle of puppy energy wrapped inside the fur of an American Bulldog.  We named her Abby.  For those of you who are familiar with this breed, she was of the Classic variety.  She took to Mel immediately.  She would lead her around the yard and through the house.  At night they were always together.  Abby would go off on her own to burn what seemed to be an endless amount of energy.  She always came back to check on her big sister. 

As Melanie began to age, Abby needed a new playmate.  We were looking like we had before and this time I connected with a Boxer.  It took a little convincing but she came home with us.  This would be Sophie.  She fell right in with what we could now call a pack.  Unfortunately, it was only for a short time.  Our beloved Melanie, welcomed her newest sister with open paws, but was only able to stay with us for three more weeks.  We all felt the pain.  But we had a new addition to the family.  Sophie would not let us stay down.  As a puppy, she was a true clown.   In trying her best to keep up with her sister, she grew into a gorgeous, stout Boxer.  She was my constant companion. 

We had a few new challenges with our changing family.  Abby was diagnosed with severe hip dysplasia. This meant, we had more frequent vet visits, new, special food and supplements to keep her healthy.  They worked.  As Abby grew, she became stronger and would only occasionally show outward signs.  Sophie had her own heart murmur.  As we learned, this is fairly common for Boxers.  These challenges only brought us closer with our girls.  So, with Abby at four and Sophie at two, we decided it was time to expand the pack. 

Again we looked at many dogs and were undecided.  On the third or fourth trip to visit, I had decided I wanted to take a close look at one dog in particular.  On our prior visits, there was one dog who was not the one at the front of the kennel begging for attention.  She was quiet and still but our eyes had met.  I decided (on my own) if that dog was there she was coming home.  If she was not, we were going to put the search on hold.  I guess I don’t have to say, she was there.  The cutest little Boston Terrier was cowering in the back.  I asked to see her.  When she was brought out to us, she was handed to my wife.  We named her Maggie. 

Maggie started life with a severe case of giardia. We did not care.  We took her to the vet almost weekly at first.  We could not cure her.  We got to the point that the vet told us she needed a series of injections that would either cure her or kill her.  We took the chance and Maggie is still with us. 

As Maggie grew, she wanted to be the alpha.  Abby was having none of it and Sophie just did not seem to care.  Abby ruled the house, Sophie was the nursemaid and my close confidant.  Maggie became my wife’s BFF.  We had a happy mostly healthy pack for another five years.

About three years ago, my heart was ripped out when Sophie was diagnosed with pancreatitis and lymphoma.  I still have a tremendous amount of guilt that I did not see symptoms in time to help her.  We put her on medication that gave her a brief remission and made her feel like her old self for a few more months.  We gave her one more Christmas, but it was not to be.  Our Sophie lost her fight a little over a month later.  Abby was nine by this time and her hips were beginning to bother her again and then she blew out a disk in her back.  In what seemed like the blink of an eye, a year and a half later, Abby left us also.  My soul was crushed, and so was my wife’s, but we still have Maggie.

Here we are, the two of us with our daughter.  That is what all of our girls are, our daughters.  Maggie is eight and in good health.  We have a long list of breeds we want to look at for the next member of the pack.  Our next son or daughter could be a pure breed.  It could be a cross breed, or even a mutt.  It won’t really matter because I know when that next dog connects with us, our list goes out the window and we will have our new child.  I look forward to spending time with a new one, seeing the bonds that they will build.  I also look forward to seeing Maggie with a new brother or sister.  I want to watch her bond with a new furry person, like her older sisters.

I know with every new addition to the family, there is the inevitable pain that will one day come.  Would I trade my time with any of my kids to take the pain away?  Do not even suggest it.  Like any human member of the family, the pain, after time, is easily outmatched by the pure joy they bring.  I can’t wait to see who is next!

I would love to hear about your family and I encourage you to donate to the ASPCA or your animal friendly charity.  Look into adoption.  You will never regret it.

My Roadmap to Obsession

One of my earliest recollections of diving head first into reference books goes to a vacation we were about to take when I was seven.  It was the summer of 1975 and I was excited about our upcoming trip through New England.  We talked about the places we would go and what we would see.  I remember hearing about Paul Revere’s house and the USS Constitution, Rockefeller Center and Kennebunkport.  I was excited because the family was excited.  I didn’t quite know why. So, at some point a few days away from piling into our Buick Skylark and hitting the road, I walked up to my mother and said “Where is New England?”  I was expecting a short answer and I would be on my merry way.  No, that is not what I got.  My mother looked at me and said, come with me. 

A moment later we were in front of a bookcase and she pulled a volume of Encyclopedia Britannica off the shelf. She showed me how she chose the correct volume. (This would come in handy for years to come.)  We opened it up and found the entry for New England.  We began to read.  More precisely, my Mom helped me understand what we were reading.  In the pages we went over was a brief explanation of where it was and why it was so named.  In the minutes or hours that followed, I am not really sure since I was so completely involved, I heard about the Pilgrims, the Boston Tea Party, and The American Revolution. We read about Mystic and Providence, Acadia National Park, Ethan Allen, The Berkshire Mountains and much more.  It was about this time that my father arrived home from work and took over for Mom. 

I need to take an aside for a moment to give you a small background on my father.  He was a CPA by trade and OCD master by need.  He was the most hyper organized person I have ever, or will ever meet. He had lists for everything.  He knew how much we needed to pack and how much room we were each allotted in the trunk to make it all fit.  He had planned out wake up calls and departure times for every day of the trip.  He knew where we would be at all times and even had contingency plans for how to get back on schedule should something interfere with our plans.  Spontaneity did have its place, but only at the pre-determined times.  Have I inherited some of this from him?  Well, yes.  But despite what my wife thinks, I am nowhere near the control freak my father was. 

Now where was I?

Dad came home and immediately pulled out the briefcase he had already packed with the itinerary and maps.  When he unfurled the first map in front of me it was as if it glowed.  I instantly became obsessed with maps.  I still am to this day.  We started at our house in Pennsylvania and he showed me the roads we would follow.  He showed me how to read the exits on the highways.  He showed me when there is a box drawn around a city, I would need to find the detail of that city in another box along the edge of the map.  When I said “I don’t see any of the places Mom told me about.” Something exciting happened.  Dad pulled out the next map!  This one was of New Jersey.  He told me we would not be here very long because we were headed to New York City.  I had no idea what to expect since this was my very first trip there.  I knew we would see the Empire State Building and we would stop at Rockefeller Center.  I had become familiar with the latter because my sister wanted to see where the skating rink was and Dad’s corporate headquarters (or as I then knew it, Dad’s other office) was across the street.  He was very careful to show me where we would be going because this was a very big place and the maps were much more detailed.  After our day in New York, we then moved into what I kept hearing the trip was all about, New England. 

Around this time, I was getting the hang of reading the maps and I asked Dad where we would be going next.  As he gave me the destinations, I would show him how we would get there.  If I strayed off course, he would explain why we were taking other roads.  So up the coast we went.  We would stay in Plymouth to see the Mayflower.  Then it was off to Boston.  Again we would pause and look at the more detailed map.  The Constitution and Old North Church were in the details now.  Leaving Boston, we went through Salem and headed north.  The next day it was off to Maine.  Lobster dinner in Kennebunkport.  Then it was inland to Concord and over to Bennington.  We would then re-cross the Hudson River moving west to Binghamton and Elmira and then turn south to Pennsylvania to complete our trip. 

I recall that trip with so much clarity because I asked my father if I could help with the trip and he told me I would be his navigator.  I held each map in my hands and watched the exit signs go by and knew exactly where we were at all times.  When we reached the end of the map, I would carefully fold the current map and open the next.  I also had the realization that I could take advantage of my sister when it came time for our unplanned adventures.  By seven, I already had my obsession for baseball in full effect and I mapped out the routs to Yankee Stadium and Fenway Park.  Dad agreed as long as I also put us back on course afterwards.  

I still have my affinity for maps.  I can sit and scan Google maps just to look around.  There is no more folding, no more changing to another map when you reach the edge.  No more looking for the city detail on the edge or other side of the map.  All you have to do is zoom in and out now.  There is no edge.  Technology is a wonderful thing.  I pore over maps when I see a story on the news, when I hear a mention of someone’s hometown that I am not familiar with or just because.  My habit still draws the occasional eye roll or head shake from my wife.  That’s okay.  I still know where I am. 

I would love to hear your comments on how you found your passion(s).  It could be when you were a child or even as an adult.  I still find new ones as an adult.  Oh, I also received straight A’s in Geography.  

Who is The Well Rounded Individual

The Well Rounded Individual

Well, that is what I aspire to be.

Yes, I was that annoying child who always asked “why”.  It did not matter the time nor place, I wanted to know why.  I wanted to know more.  The seven key questions were a staple of my day and my allies in what would become my quest to become well rounded.

As a child, I was gifted in that my parents were never the type to give me a fluff answer to keep me quiet.  I received one of two responses.  I would receive the answer, the real answer, to what I was asking.  This could lead to long protracted discussions about completely off the wall topics.  Because I asked for it.  The other response would be a very direct “go look it up”.  This lead me to the shelf containing a full set of Encyclopedia Britannica or the shelves right next to them with the reference books, atlases, almanacs, and various other fact books.  What I did not know then, and did not realize until much later is what they were doing for me.  They made me want to know more.  They made research a challenge and fun.  They sent me to find one fact and I returned with many more.  My parents gave me another gift that contributed to this as well.  When we went on vacation, no matter the destination, we would stop at historic sites, museums, or landmarks.  When I think back on our summer trips, I have no vivid memories of a beach or hotel.  I can recall with some level of detail, the places we stopped on the way.  Thank you Mom and Dad.

As an adult I found myself continuing these practices.  Whenever a question hits me, I would run to the bookshelf with my own growing reference library.  Then with the birth if the internet, slowly in the beginning, all the information I could ever hope to want was now at my fingertips.  Most every trip I would take I would try to find something significant to see.  Not every business trip allowed time for much, but I would try to see something.  

So now here I am, the universe in the palm of my hand, my quest continues.  I have my core interests.  I continue to search for more and more detail.  I have old favorites that I will revisit from time to time.  I have new topics that I am just starting to explore.  Then I have the little gems.  The things I stumble upon or come out of the blue and I just need to know more about them.  Do I make a conscious effort to make sure I am venturing into new ground?  Not always.  However, I do make an effort to branch out into the (my) unknown.  

In my current journey, I have a great partner, my wife.  She suffers from the same ailment I have, the whys.  We make a great pair.  We can talk about almost anything. We have debated everything from NASA’s next big mission to what Sci-Fi movie is better.  We delve deep into history and discuss the merits of a zone defense versus man to man. We watch every dog show and make our wish list for the next addition to our pack.  Heaven help the one of us that incorrectly identifies a song’s artist.  The other is always ready to politely and gently (not so much) pounce with the answer.  All of it done in fun, but it makes me want to continue to learn and grow my intellect.  

What I will be discussing in my blog will be topics that excite me.  It may be my ramblings about my latest amateur culinary efforts. I may reminisce about my childhood love for trains, I may rant about certain baseball announcer’s inability to properly explain the infield fly rule.  It may just be something new I found while looking for something else.  I welcome your respectful input and suggestions.  I am always looking for the next fascinating subject that waits around the corner.  Because, in the end, they are all flagstones in by path to becoming, The Well Rounded Individual.